Poison In Your Mouth
by Bandana Man's Girlfriend
Summary: Logan's furious when he finds Kendall cheating on him. He leaves, travelling the globe. But four years later, when no one has heard from him, they find out he's in an Italian hospital... SLASH Kogan, Jarlos. Title from Part Of Me by Katy Perry
1. Poison In Your Mouth

_**Me: Hola! Kogan songfic Obsessed with them at the moment!**_

_**Kendall: How nice.  
Me: You know you love your Logie-Bear!  
Logan: -pouts- You don't love me?  
Kendall: She's right! I know I love you -smiles-  
Me: -smiles- Good.**_

…**  
**

"**This is a new year. A new beginning. And things will change."****  
****―**** Taylor Swift **

…

**INFORMATION: **

**Pairings: Kogan [Kendall/Logan], Kett [Kendall, Jett], Jarlos [James/Carlos]  
Based off the song: Part Of Me – Katy Perry**

**Rating: T  
Notes: Probably going to be a Multi-Chapter… not sure yet. If you're homophobic, I would suggest leaving this story. Hurt, Character….sadness, MPreg. There'll be quite a bit of quoting in this. **

**Most of this story is told in Logan's POV. Just sayin'**

…

"Flup it," I said, smashing my shoulder into the vending machine for the twenty-fourth time. Yes, I was counting. I sighed. Stupid machine ate my money. I walked back out through the pool area, when a blond flash caught my eye. I looked up.

And that's when my heart broke.

Kendall kissed Jett, giving him a hug. I felt a tear threaten to spill, so I turned back, heading towards 2J. I pressed the elevator button, as I heard _him _yell out my name.  
"Logie!" I sighed, pressing the button rapidly. He grabbed my shoulder, and I felt tears spill.  
"Logan, listen to m-" he was cut off my a rough slap on his cheek. I gasped, not realizing what I'd done until I felt my hand stinging. I turned around, entering the elevator and going up to the second floor. I put my hand over my mouth, processing what had happened. The elevator dinged, and I exited, storming down the hallway. I slammed open the door to the apartment, and stormed past everyone (i.e, Mama K, Katie, James and Carlos).  
"Whoa…dude, what's wrong?" Carlos asked. I shook my head, storming past and into mine and Kendall's bedroom. I pulled out a suitcase, throwing clothes into it. I shut it tightly, and came out of the bedroom. Mama Knight grabbed me by the shoulders, like her son had done just moments before.  
"Hey, hey, hey, hey….Logan? Where are you going? What happened?" she asked. That's when I just let it all go. I fell back on the couch, blubbering like a little baby.  
"Logan? Get some words out for me please," she begged, looking at me like Kendall did whenever he absolutely wanted something. I looked down.  
"Kendall…" I mumbled.  
"What'd he do, honey? Did he break up with you?" I shook my head.  
"H…he…..he kissed Jett," I said, crying. I felt another hand on my shoulder, another on my back, and another on my knee. The other three looked at me sympathetically.  
"I don't want your sympathy. I want to leave," I said, getting up.  
"Where are ya gonna go, Logie?" I broke down, grabbing the suitcase.  
"Shut up Carlos!" James said, hitting his boyfriend. I sighed, grabbing a drink from the table. When I looked up, everyone was glaring at something behind me. I turned and saw Kendall, anger in his eyes, that red handprint on his cheek. I froze. He stared directly into my eyes. I couldn't imagine what he could see in my eyes. Hurt? Sadness? Betrayal?  
He walked up to me, before he reached up and grabbed something from around his neck.

He grabbed my hand and dropped the item into it. I looked at it. It was our dog-tags. The special engraved ones we got each other on Valentines Day two years ago, just before Big Time Rush broke up. I looked up, hissing as a sharp pain flew through my right cheek. I almost thought Camille had returned to the Palm Woods, but I realized she was probably too famous now to come back. I felt a blow to my stomach, making me keel over.  
"Why the fuck did you do that?"  
"You cheated on me!"  
"Since, when?"  
"Since, I just caught you kissing Jett by the pool!" I yelled. A look flashed through his eyes. Just, what I thought.  
"I'm leaving Kendall Donald Knight, and there's nothing you can do about it," I said, fuming as I grabbed the suitcase again, walking out the door.  
"Fine," he said as I reached the door.  
"I never loved you anyway," he said. I turned.  
"Why would you wanna break a perfectly good heart? Why would you wanna take our love and tear it all apart? Now, why would you wanna make the very first scar? Why would you wanna break a perfectly good heart? If you're horrible to me, I'm going to write a song about it, and you won't like it. That's how I operate. Why you gotta be so mean?" I said, hurt evident in my voice. I turned, walking through the hallway. I pressed the elevator button, and turned. I got in, and turned around.

"Logan?"  
"What?"  
"Taylor Swift," he said as the doors closed. I leant back against the wall, processing what'd just happened. The doors opened again, and I left the elevators, probably the last time I ever would. I walked through the lobby silently. All the actors, singers, models…anyone who'd come since we'd arrived, bowed their heads in respect as I strode through the room. I looked around. Many of the people I'd met in the past few years. Obviously they'd just heard me and Kendall. I wonder how many of them had known before me. I looked around, taking in the sights. I turned around as I reached the entrance, before looking at everyone, who was looking at me, before I gave a short, sharp salute. I turned, and got in the Palm Woods bus, where people were boarding to fly out. As the bus started up, I teared up.  
"I'll miss you Kenny," I mumbled, looking up at the Palm Woods logo on the side of the building.

**Four years later…**

I sat down in the truck, looking out the window into darkness and grabbing my notebook out of my pocket. I read the song I was finished a couple of weeks ago.…

_**Brought you this gift  
Memories  
Words intertwined with melodies  
I'm sure we've had our friends and our enemies  
But I don't like to reminisce like this  
Anymore than you do  
Anymore than you do**_

Everything will be just fine this time  
Everything will be just fine this time

Let's give it a rest 'cause I don't wanna fight  
Let's clean up this mess before it ends tonight  
I could've kissed your hand and tried to walk away  
But I don't like to reminisce like this  
Anymore than you do  
Anymore than you do

Everything will be just fine this time  
Everything will be just fine this time  
What do I have to say to make you feel alright?  
Everything will be just fine this time

Stop it  
You keep looking me in the eye  
Stop this  
I don't have time for another try  
To be true  
Something I could never hide  
I can't be you  
I sit around and wonder why, why

Everything will be just fine this time  
Everything will be just fine this time

Everything will be just fine this time  
Everything will be just fine this time  
What do I have to say to make you feel alright

I bit my lip. I wrote this song for him. I stared at the man next to me. He was taking me to the next destination, **San Gimignano. **** I sat back, pulling the dog tags from around my neck; looking at the name engraved in the silver metal. I tucked it back into my shirt as we entered the city. I sat back, relaxing, as I looked straight forward. The man turned, when I heard swerving, saw headlights, and felt myself being thrown forward...**

**2 Weeks Later….**

**Kendall POV:**

**We'd inherited one of Gustavo's houses. I was cleaning up after one of Carlos' tantrums. He'd found out he was pregnant several months ago, and it looked like he was ready to pop. James was doing everything for his fiancé, even if it meant trying to keep him under control. I heard someone ringing the doorbell, so I went and opened the door. A woman stood there, a sympathetic expression on her face.  
"Kendall Knight?" she asked.  
"That's me,"  
"I have some news for you. Can I come in?"  
"Sure," I said, waving her in. She went and sat down, fixing her skirt.  
"What's the news?" I asked, picking up a glass of water and taking a sip.**

**"****I'd rather wait. But if you must ask, it's about Logan," Suddenly I felt the water go the wrong way, and ended up choking. The woman slapped me hard on the back, and suddenly it went the right way.  
"How can you do that?"  
"Remember me?" she did a caw. Then it hit me. Blonde hair, martial arts expert, a hawk caw….  
"Rebecca?" she nodded.  
"So, what about Logi-Logan?" I asked, mentally cursing at myself.  
"Kendall?"  
"Mhmm,"  
"He's been in a crash," I looked up.  
"If you're joking, that's a really mean joke to pull," I said.  
"I'm not joking. He's in Italy, under severe watch. He's unconscious," she said.  
"Logie's…."  
"I would recommend you go to Italy and see him," she said.  
"JAMES!" I heard Carlos yell as he walked down towards us. James ran out from the bathroom, panicking. Both of them looked at Rebecca, quizzically. I sighed.  
"James, Carlos….this is Rebecca. She used to work for Hawk," I said.  
"Why's she here?"  
"It's Logan," she said.  
"What about Logan?" we all asked.  
"Logan Mitchell is in the hospital"**

**Hello! Okay, I hope you liked it! Just ONE good review, and I'll update!**

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	2. Viaggi

**Yay! Saw five reviews when I got on :) BTW the song titles mentioned ARE real songs. 3 are BTR, One is Kendall Schmidt.**

**Chapter 2: Travels**

…

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train. _–Oscar Wilde_

**...**  
**Kendall's POV:**

I pulled out my lyrics notebook, flipping through it. I laughed at songs we'd written when we were eight, about things like dinosaurs and the monsters under our beds [not that we were ever scared of them…pshh…what are you on about?] , songs from when we were fourteen, about first loves and heartbreaks, then from sixteen, like Blow Your Speakers Out and Worldwide, songs from when Logan left, like one called Memories, and one called Intermission. I pulled out a pencil, and started scribbling down lyrics to a song that was bugging at my brain.

_I remember tears streaming down your face_

_When I said "I'll never let you go"_

_When all those shadows almost killed your light_

_I remember you said "Don't leave me here alone"_

_But all that's dead and gone and past tonight._

_Just close your eyes_

_The sun is going down_

_You'll be alright_

_No one can hurt you now_

_Come morning light_

_You and I'll be safe and sound_

_Don't you dare look out your window_

_Darling everything's on fire_

_The war outside our door keeps raging on_

_Hold on to this lullaby_

_Even when the music's gone_

_gone_

_Just close your eyes_

_The sun is going down_

_You'll be alright_

_No one can hurt you now_

_Come morning light_

_You and I'll be safe and sound_

_Just close your eyes_

_You'll be alright_

_Come morning light_

_You and I'll be safe and sound _**(1)**

I finished scribbling the messy lyrics into the book, before looking out the plane window. We were on our way to Florence, Italy, where Logan was in hospital. We'd received papers about the condition of the crash. Apparently, Logan was the only survivor. But he made it out with a coma, brain injuries, broken bones, and a spinal injury. The driver who caused the crash was later found to be drunk. They obviously couldn't arrest him, as he was now dead. In fact, both drivers were dead, I realized as I scribbled down more lyrics in the notebook. I felt someone tap my knee, and looked up. Carlos was sitting next to me.  
"You okay Kendall?" he asked, wiping a tear I didn't know was falling from my cheek.  
"Sometimes when one person is missing, it seems like the whole world is depopulated," I said, looking at him.  
"Alphonse de Lamartine," he said. I looked over at James, who was watching us with a sorry look in his eyes.  
"Kendall, he's going to be okay," James said, coming and kneeling beside us.  
"James, he's in a coma!" I said. He looked down, sighing.  
"Wrong thing to say," he mumbled. Carlos squeezed my knee.  
"We're here for you 'Dizzle. Both you and Loges," he said. I patted his round abdomen.  
"Thanks, 'Litos," I said. He smiled, going back to his seat with James. I shut the window-shade, and pulled out a small photo album. I opened it up, looking at the message in the cover.

_Dear Kendall,_

_Just wanted to send this to you, to say, Happy Birthday. I hope your 24__th__ is a good one. Not giving away my location…which is why I'm sending this as I leave, but I still feel like I can't trust you. What you did that day I left…it made me feel weak and troubled. But I met people. A guy named Ethan, who's from New Zealand and was backpacking around Canada, a girl named Elsie, who's from France, and is two years younger than us. Ethan has blue eyes and short blond hair, and plays rugby. Elsie has bright red hair and brown eyes, and is even quieter than me as the new kid. She barely speaks English, but she's cute. Not in that way. I'm still going to say I like _you _Kenny. I miss you. So, I sent this to you…I'm not sure if you would accept it, but it's worth a shot. So….I just wanted to say,_

_Drop everything now_

_Meet me in the pouring rain_

_Kiss me on the sidewalk_

_Take away the pain_

_'Cause I see, sparks fly whenever you smile_

_Get me with those green eyes, baby_

_As the lights go down_

_Something that'll haunt me when you're not around_

_'Cause I see, sparks fly whenever you smile_

_I can just imagine you saying "Taylor Swift", just like the day I left. They were the last words I heard from you. And they stayed in my mind. Your voice, your mouth, your words._

So, time to go.  
Lots of….love?  
Hortense Mitchell

I flipped the page, seeing the first picture he'd put in. It was one of us sleeping in the car together. I smiled, looking at the opposite page. It was a picture of him with a blond boy, probably Ethan, on top of the Eiffel Tower. I turned the page. It was one of both of us, taken at a precise moment, so that our faces are scrunched up and water is spraying as we jump into the Palm Woods pool. On the opposite page is one of Logan on the Sydney Harbor Bridge in Australia, his arms in a 'Y' position. I turned the page. One of him and me, performing at one of our concerts. Then a picture of him with a redhead girl, probably Elsie, doing yoga in front of the Eiffel Tower. Then a picture of me kissing his cheek on the Palm Woods roof, with the Hollywood sign in the background. And on the opposite page, a picture of him looking out over crystal blue (well, gray, the picture was in black-and-white) water. I smiled, stroking the picture gently. I felt a tear drop onto my hand, but didn't bother to wipe my eyes or my hand. I lifted my knees up onto the chair, as I pulled out my iPhone, flicking through photos of Logan and me together. I heard that we were coming into Florence, so I buckled up again. I turned off my phone, and opened the window-shade, staring out at Italy. We landed, and I saw a lot of girls in their teens and twenties holding BTR signs. I was confused. I mean, it had been six years since Big Time Rush ended. We exited the plane, giving small waves. Personally, I was amazed our fans had stuck through everything, such as Big Time Rush coming out, the band breaking up, Logan and I breaking up, and more recently, Carlos becoming pregnant and Logan in the hospital. We exited the plane, and went to meet the fans. They'd learnt enough English to ask us questions and for photos and autographs. I watched as Carlos and James interacted with the fans. I was called out of concentration as I heard my name being called. I turned and walked over to a little girl, with dark hair and full eyebrows. She was pressed up against the barrier, so I bent down and knelt in front of her. She smiled.  
"Hello. What's your name?"  
"Giuliana," her big sister said, "She doesn't speak English". I smiled.  
"Ciao Giuliana. Vuoi un autografo? Una foto?" I asked. She shook her head.  
"Tenero la mano," she murmured.  
"Hold out your hand," her sister translated. I did, and she placed a small flower with six bright white leaf-shaped petals and a bright yellow stigma into it. I smiled.  
"Una stella di Betlemme," I said. A Star of Bethlehem flower. A symbol of hope.  
"Grazie, Giuliana," I said. I turned to her sister.  
"What's your name?"  
"Vitalia. Can I please have an autograph and a photo?" she asked, holding up a digital camera.  
"Sure," I took the camera from her, wrapping an arm around her shoulder and smiling as it flashed. I gave her a hug and signed the Polaroid photo that had just printed out. I put the flower through the button-hole, and leant over the railings to pick up Giuliana. I put her on my hip, kissing her cheek as Vitalia took a photo.  
"Can you take another one of me and Giuliana? I'd like to show Logan," I said. She nodded, taking a picture of Giuliana and I.  
" Grazie, Giuliana. Vado a fare una foto di voi a Logan, in modo che possa vedere quando si sveglia,"**(2)** I told the little girl. She nodded, as I passed her back to Vitalia, who gave me the photo of me kissing Giuliana's cheek. I smiled.  
"Grazie, Vitalia," I said, turning and going over to Carlos and James. I went and patted Carlos' back, as I passed them, slipping on my sunglasses as I waved to the fans before getting into the car that was waiting for us. I rested my head against the window frame, as James and Carlos got in. They sat next to me as I plugged in my earphones, looking out the tinted windows as we traveled through to the hospital…

**I hope you liked it! So yeah, here are translations/notifications :) **

**1: Safe and Sound – Taylor Swift feat. The Civil Wars**

**2: "Thank you Giuliana, I'm going to take a picture of you to Logan, so he can see when he wakes up"**

**Please review!**

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